Sometimes you just have to pass these jewels along – hope you enjoy this mid-week laugh.

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t (Gee, does that ever sound familiar)
2.. I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3.. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke .
5.. Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6.. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe .
9.. I’m not a complete idiot — Some parts are missing.
10.. Out of my mind.  Back in five minutes
11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16.. Being “over the hill” is much better than being under it!
17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up!!!!
18 Procrastinate Now!
19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts;  Do You Want Fries With That?
20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken .
24 He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26.. Ham and eggs…A day’s work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27.. The trouble with life is there’s no background music .
28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29.. I smile because I don’t know what the hell is going on.


  1. Hi there nancy,
    Thank you for them. Great to have a read and a laugh.
    I am sure that all those that come here will at least laugh to them selves and some of them.


  2. Nancy,

    Wow these little sayings do bring a smile to my face. I
    think they are good start for the beginning of the week.
    I love them.


    Skype: frsprt21462

  3. Hehehehe, Nancy , those were great, fantastic way to get a great laugh in the middle of some task, a great pick me upper , and basically anytime of the day to put a smile across your face. Really enjoy it. Thanks for sharing.

    Susie Moore
    skype smsforce

  4. I love the laughing monkey picture! One of these should be funny, but in my case it is the Truth with a capital T. I would tell you which one, but putting it in print could get me in trouble, so I’ll have to tell you when we talk.

  5. Too funny! We absolutely LOVE the fact that you integrate humor into your home based business. Isn’t that what it’s all about and why we chose this industry as opposed to uptight corporate America?! Life’s too short to take it serious. Love and laugh! Thanks so much for sharing! You’re awesome!

    • yes we do need to laugh and enjoy life and the timing for this one was great for me actually – funny how those things work

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